Why You, Why Me, Why Now?
tl;dr: I like to help people for free. The world is in an irrational state. Fight irrationality with irrationality.
It’s easier to explain “why you” if I explain “why me” first. But you coming first is an important distinction.
I have a unique philosophy. I’m not sure what to call it, but names aren’t important.
I am a paradox; I am at all times a work-in-progress, and a perfect, finished product. I must demand contentment at each moment for my current self, but at each same moment seek another piece. I believe all people exist in these states, whether they know it or not. A state of constant change, and a constant flow of moments.
Each piece of my myself that I remove, more takes its place, yet I always end up with more than before.
I seek to add more to myself, the rough and the smooth. I ask nothing of you, but you. No money, no support, no guilt. I am here, for you, for free. I am small, and compared to how far I can see now, this will be small too. But my reach is real, my power is real, and my ability to help is real too.
I spend my money, my time, my effort and work, to help you.
All of you, and only you.
I learn from you, I help you, I benefit from you through our faithful communication.
I will never advertise to you (aside from how to conceal your email), I will never tell you more than you ask of me.
This friendship is entirely on your terms.
Why Now?
The world is bananas, man. I am afraid every day. I don’t know what the future looks like. So if the world doesn’t look the same in one year’s time, what will I have done to help?
I can’t offer any support but friendship. No financial support, no legal support, I’m just one person.
But sometimes, that is enough. And I deeply feel like people are lacking in opportunities for support, RIGHT NOW. I don’t care how things were or how they might be. When I talk to people in my family, talk to my friends, talk to people in my community, they are scared. They don’t know what’s going on, and they don’t know who to trust.
I am not asking you to trust me, I am asking you to build a new relationship of trust, entirely on your terms. If you have heard directly from me about this project, you might feel like you can’t participate because we already have a relationship of sorts.
But can’t it be fun to build another one? I am *asking* for anonymity here. And the one key factor that I want to emphasize here is that I will almost certainly never know what you look like since we will only chat over email.
We have begun to associate anonymity with animosity, but I want to show how much it can help you build relationships.
I chose $5,000 because it represents two values for me that I experienced in the last 10 years while trying to treat my own mental health.
One year, 52 weeks of insured therapy, 52 x $100 = $5,200.
One year, 12 months of health insurance, 12 x $400 = $4,800.
I have confidence I can do much more good for myself and for others with the same amount of money. Not to denounce therapy, it’s truly valuable and necessary at its own times. Just a symbolic amount of money, in protest of the system that so many can’t afford to exist in. To represent people who were suffering like I did, crushed by money as well as a lack of support.
Those people still exist. Some people don’t need therapy, they might just need someone to talk to, at least some times. I’m not afraid to suggest professional help if situations are beyond me, but I am not afraid to listen either.
The last ten years have been a culture of confusion, distrust, and fear. I seek to repair the flaws within our society caused by systems that I can resist.
Nicky